the princess and the frog

Posted on January 2, 2011. Filed under: Gender Relations |

At the risk of sounding somewhat superficial, I can’t help but wonder what’s at work whenever I see a “mismatched” couple. She’s cute like a button and he’s as ugly as sin or vice-versa. You readers probably ask the same question I do, “how did he get that girl?”.

What is ugly/attractive? Attractive is an adjective describing any object or concept which one finds appealing. Ugly is an adjective describing any object or concept which one finds appalling. Attractive/Ugly is not relative, it’s an absolute. Something is either attractive or not. Interestingly though, the things or people that are considered attractive/ugly vary across cultures and sub-cultures.

Back to the origin of this blog. I have a friend who recently married her boyfriend of 11 years. She’s gorgeous and he is quite the opposite (damn, I sound jealous and petty).  I bluntly asked her  one day about why she chose to date this gentleman. I also had a chat with a few female friends about dating an “ugly” man.

Most Jamaican women are of the view 99% of  men are cheaters and attractive men cheat way more than ugly men.

For the girl with no boyfriend and is sick of all the head games played by attractive men,  all she wants is an honest, trustworthy, fun man who can bring stability into her life. She’s a little less concerned with the package/wrapping and more concerned with the contents.

“Ugly man full a lyrics Garth”, that’s what a friend said to me. I laughed for days, but apparently the “ugly” man speaks confidently and says the right words to make her feel good about herself. It also helps when he’s capable of having an interesting and intelligent conversation. My married friend said her hubby is the funniest man she knows, he keeps her happy and smiling. He never gives her a reason to feel insecure or worry about some other woman.

Apparently women want a man who can romance them and make ’em  feel special; not only for their bodies, but also for their mind and soul (sounds kinda cliche). Another friend added that the ugly man must be awesome in bed. “If mi ago lay dung wid a ugly man, it haffi worth it”. I never asked my married friend about her hubby’s sexual prowess, but it appears she’s satisfied.

Money helps too! Women love stability in all areas of the relationship, but financial stability is probably#1 or at least in the top 3. It just so happens that my friend’s husband “financially comfortable”.

MORAL OF THE STORY

I guess in the end the old adage “never judge a book by its cover” is really true.  The frog may look ugly but the princess finds real beauty in him.

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4 Responses to “the princess and the frog”

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Love this one Garth–

Lol..ugly is relative yute..but some a dem buck di uglyometer…but some a dem woman ya love too much confidence boost…bout dem wah feel good I’m self afta dem mek demself season gal inna. H/s..dem nah get my ugly money or compliments..stick to mi ugly ‘kind’..hahahaha

This is so on point… up to a point. I think ugly men tend to spend more time developing their personalities than the “face boys”, and also looove to show off their girl (which we really, really like!) My ex was ugly and it was the best relationship I ever had. He was funny, attentive, and even though I think I look pretty average, made me feel like Yendi. And the sex was superb!

BUT! It is a myth that they cheat less than other men – given the same opportunities, they cheat just as often. And I think some of them, no matter how confident they appear, are secretly insecure, so woe be unto your relationship if a woman throws themselves at him! And women will do this. If they see him with a fairly attractive female, he is confident and financially secure, mi sorry fi yu! Women will run een for the sheer heck of it. And it hurts more when a ugly boyfriend cheats than a regular/attractive one. I dont know why, but the bun hotta! You think “Imagine, afa mi struggle with miself to look pass him face, start nuh feel no way to walk an swing han with this man in public, him go cheat???”

So, if you find a ugly man who truly loves you, is confident with himself and really appreciates you, hang on to him. But mi sorry fi yu if him eva stray – your pride will never recover.

I like this blog! Nicki’s comments are right on!


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