Marriage – good stuff

Posted on November 22, 2010. Filed under: Personal Development |

Recently I wrote about not rushing to end single life. Shortly after posting, some of my married friends contacted me speaking about their “wedded bliss”, others complained about life with their spouse. Since I’m all about being balanced, I thought it would only be fair to “big up” marriage.

Statistics locally and globally show a decline in number of marriages annually. There are numerous reasons for this but that’s not what this blog is about. A single female friend commented to me the other day that married men might be a dying breed and ‘marryable’ men might need a lifeline soon too.

Marriage for many men is a scary prospect. We love change and marriage doesn’t seem to offer many options or freedoms. I’m however minded by the fact that every woman/wife is different, so a man must make an extremely careful choice when considering a mate to be with permanently.

Many men think marriage is for suckers/whimps. Some view it as the final nail in their coffin, but still hope to get married someday. Truth be told, I think being married is ultimately way better than being single. Marriage is a lofty ambition that I will attain long before

Various studies have indicated that HAPPILY married men tend to outlive single men. A 2006 study performed by University of California researchers contended that single people are five times more likely to die of infectious disease, nearly 40% more likely to die of heart disease and twice as likely to die accidentally. Other studies suggest that the rate of mortality is a whopping 250% higher among single men than it is among married men.

Another married friend of mine pointed out that being married means sharing expenses. He (and his wife) can afford things they would have a real challenge acquiring individually. I love being a father and it’s one experience almost every man wants, but don’t have a  hav to be married to start a family. However, marriage is the most stable and secure environment in which to start a family. Plus when you’re married and raising children you avoid the clumsy ways of describing the “other” parent. You know, like “Baby mama/daddy” or any other such description. Marriage, another friend says is an investment in the future. He’s 53 and says he doesn’t regret giving up the wild orgies of his single 20’s. “Garth, mi nuh sexy like one time. Dem young gal yah wouldn’t want me now, is me money dem woulda want. Mi wife love me and she want me so dat we can gwaan grow old together.” I agree with him, neither of them will have to ‘age alone’.

Years ago I tried an experiment. For 6months I wore a wedding band just to see how my exploits with women would change. Women love a taken man. The ring made very little difference to most of the women with whom I flirted. They all found it amusing after I revealed that the ring was nothing more than an experiment. So I guess a married man’s ego can be stroked should by women who are “attracted to the ring”. Hopefully he’s a faithful husband who won’t allow any woman but his wife to stroke anything else of his.

Business favours married couples. Insurance, taxes, home loans, car loans you name it, it’s all easier to access if you’re married. Is anyone gonna lobby against that?

Married couples know each other; they have a feel for each others’ bodies and are aware of their partner’s fantasies. As a result, married sex is better than single sex. A long, stable relationship lends itself to sexual experimentation. Admit it; there are things you’d love to try in bed that you’ve never told anyone because you were afraid of being judged. But in a long-term relationship founded on trust, you can give voice to your innermost desires.

I read online that married people are happier than single people. I have trouble believing that because most of the miserable people I know are married, lol. Anyhow, a recent study at an Australian university shows that married men are happier than single men. In fact, married men are 135% more likely to report a happiness score than single men. The U.W.I. should carry out a similar research in the Caribbean.

I’m sure there are lots more great things to highlight about marriage, but until I take that step I doubt I’ll know what those things are.

DISCLAIMER: I’m not married! All I did was have a conversation with a few of my married friends and did some research online.

 

 

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One Response to “Marriage – good stuff”

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I think the problem lies in that most J’can men want to be married or in a committed relation and still be single…


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